BDSM is an acronym for Bondage, Discipline, Sadism, and Masochism. This is a kind of sexual practice where there is some consensual exchange of power between two or more persons. This practice has been gaining mainstream exposure for quite a few years now, after books and movies like ‘Fifty Shades of Grey’. Yet, to an extremely curious newcomer, it is overwhelming, considering that terminologies describing BDSM seem to float everywhere. The purpose of this paper is to provide a glossary of terms describing the BDSM community so that interested people may learn about the practice.
1. Dom/Dominant: A person who takes on the dominant role in a BDSM relationship. This person is in control and makes decisions for the submissive partner.
2. Sub/Submissive: A person who takes on the submissive role in a BDSM relationship. This person gives up control to the dominant partner and follows their commands.
3. Switch: A person who enjoys both the dominant and submissive roles in a BDSM relationship.
4. Top: A person who takes on the dominant role in a BDSM scene or play session.
5. Bottom: A person who takes on the submissive role in a BDSM scene or play session.
6. Scene: A planned and consensual BDSM activity between two or more individuals.
7. Play Session: A more casual and spontaneous BDSM activity between two or more individuals.
8. Safeword: A pre-determined word or phrase used to stop a BDSM scene or play session if one of the partners becomes uncomfortable or feels unsafe.
9. Aftercare: The time and attention given to a partner after a BDSM scene or play session to ensure their physical and emotional well-being.
10. Consent: The voluntary agreement of all parties involved in a BDSM activity. Consent is a crucial aspect of BDSM and should be given freely and enthusiastically.
11. Safe, Sane, and Consensual (SSC): A philosophy in the BDSM community that emphasizes the importance of safety, sanity, and consent in all activities.
12. Risk-Aware Consensual Kink (RACK): A philosophy in the BDSM community that acknowledges and embraces the potential risks involved in BDSM activities, as long as they are consensual.
13. Limits: Boundaries set by individuals in a BDSM relationship that should not be crossed without prior discussion and consent.
14. Hard Limit: An activity or behavior that is not negotiable and will not be performed under any circumstances.
15. Soft Limit: An activity or behavior that a person may be willing to try with the right partner or under specific circumstances.
16. Safe, Sane, Consensual, and Fun (SSCF): An extension of the SSC philosophy that emphasizes the importance of fun and pleasure in BDSM activities.
17. Subspace: A mental and physical state of euphoria experienced by a submissive partner during a BDSM scene or play session.
18. Domdrop: The feeling of emotional and physical exhaustion experienced by a dominant partner after a BDSM scene or play session.
19. Vanilla: A term used to describe individuals who are not involved in or familiar with BDSM practices.
20. Collar: A symbol of ownership and commitment in a BDSM relationship, often worn by a submissive partner.
21. Dungeon: A designated space or room for BDSM activities, often equipped with various toys and equipment.
22. Bondage: The act of restricting a person’s movement through the use of ropes, cuffs, or other restraints. Bondage can be used for a variety of purposes, including sensory deprivation, power exchange, and humiliation.
23. Discipline: A form of power exchange in which one person (the dominant) assumes control over another person (the submissive) through the use of rules, punishment, and structure. Discipline can be used to create a sense of order, consistency, and security within a BDSM relationship.
24. Sadism: The enjoyment of inflicting physical or emotional pain on a partner.
25. Masochism: The enjoyment of receiving physical or emotional pain from a partner.
26. Impact Play: The act of hitting, spanking, or using other objects to create physical sensations during a BDSM scene.
27. Sensory Play: The use of sensory stimulation, such as blindfolds, feathers, or ice, to enhance arousal and pleasure during a BDSM scene.
28. Roleplay: The act of assuming a specific role or character during a BDSM scene.
29. Dominatrix/Domme: A female Dominant in a BDSM relationship or scene.
30. Master/Mistress: A term used by a submissive partner to address their Dominant partner.
Conclusion: BDSM is, in itself, an extremely broad and various practice with a lot of activities and dynamics involved. More than that, these are just some of the terms which have been used in the context of a BDSM relationship. Equally important is the variation of these terminologies across people and, of course, the imperative need to negotiate and agree on them with the other person. Communication, consent, and respect are very critical elements of any BDSM relationship or activity, with the understanding of the terminology used to describe the acts being part of this process of discovery.
