The concept of abstinence until marriage has been highly debated for many decades. While some people feel that the practice is an indicator of virtue, commitment, and long-lasting relationships, others believe that it puts forth very unrealistic expectations from a marriage that may go on to cause problems. This paper looks into the real world of waiting until marriage to have sex and explores the potential consequences, both positive and negative.
First and foremost, it is important to note that the decision to wait until marriage to have sex is a personal one and should be respected as such. It is a choice that should be made by both individuals in a relationship, and should not be forced upon anyone. With that being said, let us examine what may happen when a couple chooses to wait until marriage to have sex.
Strengthening the Marital Bond:
One of the most significant benefits of waiting until marriage to have sex is the potential to strengthen the marital bond. When couples choose to abstain from sexual activity before marriage, they are making a conscious decision to build their relationship on a foundation of emotional and spiritual connection, rather than physical attraction alone. This can lead to a deeper level of intimacy and understanding between partners, as they are forced to communicate and connect on a more meaningful level. In addition, the act of waiting until marriage to have sex can serve as a symbol of commitment and trust, further strengthening the bond between partners.
Reducing the Risk of Sexually Transmitted Infections (STIs):
One positive result of abstaining from sex until marriage can be a lower risk of contracting sexually transmitted infections (STIs). The American Sexual Health Association reports that an alarming 20 million new STIs are diagnosed annually in the United States, and half of these cases occur in young people between the ages of 15 and 24. Engaging in sexual activity with multiple partners increases the risk of contracting an STI, and even with the use of contraceptives, protection against STIs is not guaranteed. By waiting until marriage to have sex, individuals can significantly reduce their risk of exposure to these potentially harmful infections.
Promoting Personal Growth and Self-Discovery:
Choosing to abstain from sex until marriage can have a positive impact on an individual’s personal growth and self-discovery. By refraining from sexual activity, an individual can direct their attention towards their own personal development, such as their education, career, and relationships with friends and family. This focus can result in increased self-awareness and self-confidence, which can be advantageous in various areas of life. Furthermore, the decision to wait until marriage to have sex can be a powerful statement of personal values and beliefs, helping individuals to define their own identity and make choices that align with their unique worldview.
However, there are also potential negative consequences of waiting until marriage to have sex.
Communication: One potential negative consequence of waiting until marriage to have sex is the impact it can have on communication within a relationship. For many couples, sexual intimacy is a way to express their love and commitment to one another. For those who choose to wait until marriage, this form of communication may be absent, potentially leading to misunderstandings and a lack of emotional intimacy. Furthermore, waiting until marriage to discuss expectations and boundaries around sex can lead to confusion and frustration, as both partners may have different ideas about what is acceptable.
Relationship Satisfaction: Another potential consequence of waiting until marriage to have sex is its impact on relationship satisfaction. Research has shown that sexual satisfaction is linked to overall relationship satisfaction, and that couples who are satisfied with their sex life are more likely to report higher levels of relationship satisfaction. For couples who wait until marriage to have sex, the buildup of sexual tension and anticipation may lead to high levels of satisfaction initially, but this may fade over time. Furthermore, the absence of sexual intimacy in a relationship can make it more difficult to resolve conflicts, as sexual intimacy can be a powerful tool for reconnecting and rebuilding trust after a disagreement.
Risk of Unintended Pregnancy: Waiting until marriage to have sex can also increase the risk of unintended pregnancies. For couples who wait until marriage, the first time they have sex may be unplanned, and they may not have taken the necessary precautions to prevent pregnancy. Furthermore, for couples who have been waiting for a long time, the urgency to have sex may lead to a lack of attention to contraceptive methods. This can lead to unintended pregnancies, which can have significant emotional and financial consequences for both partners.
This therefore shows that the decision to hold on until marriage is a personal decision and thus has to be respected. While it might create a strong bond and prevent STIs, it might on the other hand also lead to unrealistic expectations and sexual incompatibility, with pressure to have a perfect wedding night. Whatever the decision, it is worthy to note that couples should be open and honest about their desires and expectations with respect to sexual behavior. After all, a good and satisfactory sex life is the one underpinned by mutual respect, trust, and communication, regardless of when it initiates.
