Sad After Sex? A Surprising Number Of Women Say Yes–what’s Going On?

While sex may indeed seem something exciting and pleasurable, for millions of women, it only fills them with sadness and emotional emptiness. Surprisingly, many women report feelings of sadness after sex. This condition, known as postcoital dysphoria, or PCD for short, is surprisingly common but imperfectly understood. For that reason, the potential causes of PCD, consequences for women’s mental health, and how to handle and cope with this terrible experience are going to be discussed in this paper.

First, it is important to define PCD and understand its prevalence. PCD is a temporary feeling of sadness, anxiety, or irritability that occurs immediately after sexual activity. While it is often referred to as post-sex blues, it can also occur after masturbation or any type of sexual activity. According to a study published in The Journal of Sexual Medicine, 46% of women reported experiencing PCD at least once in their lifetime, with 5% experiencing it frequently (five or more times in the past six months). These numbers suggest that PCD is a common experience for women and should not be dismissed or ignored.

The exact cause of PCD is unknown, but there are several potential factors that may contribute to its occurrence. One theory is that PCD is a result of hormonal changes that occur during and after sex. During orgasm, the body releases a surge of hormones, including dopamine and oxytocin, which are associated with pleasure and bonding. However, after this surge, the body may experience a sudden drop in these hormones, leading to feelings of sadness or emptiness. Additionally, the release of prolactin, a hormone that is associated with relaxation and sleep, may also contribute to feelings of exhaustion and emotional vulnerability.

Another potential factor is the societal expectations and pressure surrounding sex. Women are often portrayed as passive objects of desire in media and society, and this can lead to feelings of guilt, shame, or disappointment after sex. Women may also feel pressure to perform and meet certain expectations, which can be emotionally taxing and lead to feelings of sadness or inadequacy.

In addition to hormonal and societal factors, past experiences and trauma may also play a role in PCD. Women who have a history of sexual abuse or trauma may experience feelings of sadness or distress after sex, as it can trigger memories or emotions associated with their past experiences. This can be especially true for women who have not fully processed or healed from their trauma.

One of the main concerns about PCD is its impact on women’s mental health. While it is often temporary and lasts only a few hours, some women may experience PCD on a regular basis, which can significantly affect their well-being. In a study published in The Journal of Sexual Medicine, women who reported frequent PCD also reported higher levels of depression, anxiety, and stress. This suggests that PCD may be a symptom of underlying mental health issues or may exacerbate existing ones.

Furthermore, the shame and stigma surrounding PCD may prevent women from seeking help or talking about their experiences. This can lead to feelings of isolation and loneliness, which can further contribute to the negative impact of PCD on mental health. It is important for women to feel comfortable and supported in discussing their experiences with PCD and seeking help if needed.

So, what can be done to address and cope with PCD?

Validation and Communication

Validating the experience of PCD is a crucial first step in addressing and coping with this phenomenon. Women who experience PCD should know that they are not alone and that their feelings are a common and natural occurrence. It is essential to break the silence surrounding PCD and encourage open conversations about it to reduce feelings of shame, guilt, and isolation. Communicating with a partner about PCD can also be helpful, as it can promote mutual understanding and support. By talking openly about their feelings, women can help their partners become more aware of their emotional needs and develop strategies to respond to them effectively.

Self-Care and Pleasurable Activities

Practicing self-care is vital in managing the symptoms of PCD. Engaging in activities that bring joy and relaxation can help alleviate the negative emotions associated with PCD. These activities may include exercise, spending time with loved ones, or pursuing hobbies. Taking care of one’s physical health can also positively impact mental and emotional well-being. Therefore, women who experience PCD should prioritize their overall health and engage in habits that promote wellness, such as getting enough sleep, eating a balanced diet, and practicing stress management techniques.

Therapy and Counseling

Seeking professional help can be particularly beneficial for women who experience PCD. Therapists and counselors can provide a safe and supportive space to explore the underlying causes of PCD, such as trauma or mental health issues. Cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) is one effective approach that can help women reframe negative thoughts and emotions related to PCD. Additionally, sex therapists can provide guidance and support to help women and their partners develop healthy communication and sexual habits that promote intimacy and reduce the likelihood of PCD.

In summary, PCD is very common in women but has partaken minimal understanding. Some of the possible factors which can cause PCD are hormonal alteration, societal pressure, and past trauma. It is contributed to the women who experience PCD to recognize, validate, and seek support if necessary. Much awareness needs to be put into PCD to deconstruct its stigma and create better support for women’s mental health.

Was this helpful?

Thanks for your feedback!