Believe it or not, many women are involved in sex only to make babies. So, it is possible and real. However, people have questions, and one of the questions is, is it normal for women not to want sex after having a baby?
Unlike the major sexual complaint of men, which undoubtedly is erectile dysfunction, the biggest sexual problem for women i.e. low sex drive, is blamed on a mix of both physical and mental factors. In many instances, ED for men can be treated by just popping a pill, mostly Viagra or some hormone inducing substances.
The same cannot be said about the loss of interest in sex by women. Sheryl Kingsberg, Ph.D., a sex psychologist argues that the sexuality of a woman is not only multifaceted but also quite complicated and there is a wide range of reasons responsible for low sexual drive in women while each of them requiring different types of countermeasures. Therefore, in as much as medical practitioners and sex therapists would love to come up with one or two treatments or a one-punch treatment, their efforts have not born fruits.
Among the major causes of low sex drive in women is the birth of a child. Note that the same happens at some points during pregnancy. Clearly, the life of a woman is never easy. Post Partum libido loss in women particularly happens after the first baby. Here are some of the factors attributed to this sexual dysfunction.
Fatigue
Taking care of a newborn is not a walk in the park. It is usually a huge change in a woman’s life, and her partner too. By the end of the day, you find yourself emotionally and physically drained due to the attention given to the newborn which is physically demanding and also requires utmost patience and a great deal of diligence. Taking care of the baby is almost a fulltime job which means that the last thing on the list is to have sex. Also, certain trivial reasons stop you from lovemaking like the motherly concern about leaving your baby in a separate room, constant worry about baby tantrums and checking up every other minute if it is crying, or hungry or need a diaper change. It is a whole lot of work to do and sex goes right out of the window.
She isn’t sleeping well
Due to the burden of taking care of the young one, she isn’t getting enough sleep, and this reflects in her sex drive. At the moment, she just wishes she could sleep longer. However, it is nearly impossible, especially because it will be a while before the baby starts to sleep throughout the night.
Men need to understand this situation and handle it with a lot of wisdom so that their female partners can feel more at ease. If possible, men are advised to help their partners take care of the little one so she can catch some sleep. Once she starts getting sufficient sleep, her sex drive will increase.
Healing is taking place
Combine the fatigue of taking care of a newborn with the recovery from the pains of giving birth – irrespective of whether delivery took place vaginally or via cesarean section – and life couldn’t get any harder. Labor pains, for a good number of women, are especially traumatizing. For such a woman, sex is the last thing she will think of at this point in her life. Besides, the hormones are usually in the process of returning to normalcy, and this could take a toll on her. On top of this, the vagina goes through a series of changes. Post childbirth the vagina feels unusually dry and loose and may lead to pain during a sexual encounter. Some women even find it to be bruised or swollen. Although the vagina gradually returns to a normal state, it could be weeks or months before sex feels better.
Poor body image/ low self-esteem
For starters, a woman who has recently given birth might be afraid of engaging in sex as she worries that it might be painful. Also, the first sexual encounters after childbirth are coupled with discomforts. These difficult experiences alongside the fact that her body is still recovering from childbirth (don’t forget the weight gain which is significant at times) may leave a woman feeling less attractive. Remember, low self-esteem, or poor body image can make any woman feel less sexy and in turn affect her interest in sexual activities.
Postpartum depression is real!
Is it possible that you are depressed? Postpartum depression is a common occurrence nowadays. Depression has the potential to adversely impact your moods, your energy levels, as well as sexual appetite. If you suspect that you are having postnatal depression, consider seeking professional help.
What is the way forward?
In a few months, things will get back to normal. Of paramount importance is to make sure that the new mother receives as much support as possible. If possible, she should get assistance with not only the housework but also with taking care of the baby.
This kind of help goes a long way in alleviating the possible symptoms of postpartum depression – another cause of low sex drive. If you are currently in this predicament, let your partner know what you are going through. Keeping communication lines open helps a lot in situations of this nature.
To conclude, we discussed how not craving sex after having a baby is normal and how ladies actually feel after the delivery. We hope the data provided can help you tone down your urges and comfort your partner.
Ask Us Questions Related To Is It Normal Not To Want Sex After Having A Baby?
Is it normal to have low libido post-pregnancy?
Yes. It is very common for women to feel less desire or no desire for sex for the first few months after having a baby. Not only humans but even animals avoid mating after giving birth to the child. Therefore, low sex drive post-pregnancy is just a normal reaction of your body to all the recent experiences.
What are the factors that cause women less interested in physical intimacy after having a baby?
There are a number of reasons that can lead to the feeling of less interested in sex after giving birth to a baby. Some of the major influencing factors are:
- You take care of the newborn all around the clock. It can be tiring both physically and emotionally. Later when you get some time, you would want that for yourself and refrain from any more physical contact.
- Your body is still healing from labor pain. Therefore, it might cause some discomfort for the first few months after delivery. Some women even find it uncomfortable to have sex for the first few times after pregnancy.
- After giving birth, the hormonal cycle of your body will be out of balance. These continuous hormonal changes may cause low sex drive.
- You might consciously or unconsciously think of getting pregnant again while having sex, and so, you might ignore having any physical activity.
Is this low libido phase temporary after giving birth to a child?
Yes. This phase is temporary, and many women regain their sex drive within a few months after pregnancy. However, some women might find it difficult to have sex even after a few months. In such cases, feel free to talk to a medical practitioner about the same. The causes of low sex drive may vary and so the solutions.
How Do I Get My Sex Drive Back After Having A Baby?
Introduction
After giving birth, the focus shifts to taking care of the newborn, leaving little time for self-care and intimacy with one’s partner. This can lead to a decrease in libido, commonly known as sex drive, which can be frustrating for both partners. As a new mother, it can be challenging to find the time and energy to prioritize one’s sexual desire. However, it is essential to address this issue and find ways to get the sex drive back after having a baby. In this paper, we will discuss some practical tips and strategies to reclaim the lost libido and rekindle the intimacy in a relationship after giving birth.
Understanding the Effects of Hormonal Changes
The primary reason for a decrease in sex drive after having a baby is the hormonal changes that occur during pregnancy and childbirth. The body goes through a significant transformation, and the levels of estrogen and progesterone decrease. These hormones play a crucial role in sexual desire and arousal. Additionally, the production of prolactin, the hormone responsible for milk production, can also decrease libido. These hormonal changes can also cause vaginal dryness, making sex uncomfortable or even painful. It is essential to understand that these changes are temporary and can be managed with proper care and attention.
Communicate with Your Partner
Communication is the key to any successful relationship, and it is crucial to openly discuss the changes in sex drive with your partner. It is common for partners to have different libido levels, and this can cause frustration and tension in a relationship. By communicating, you can address any concerns or misunderstandings and find ways to support each other. It is essential to be honest and understanding with each other and work together to find a solution.
Take Care of Your Physical and Mental Health
As a new mother, it is natural to feel exhausted and overwhelmed. However, it is crucial to take care of your physical and mental health to improve your overall well-being and boost your sex drive. Get enough sleep whenever possible, eat a balanced and nutritious diet, and stay hydrated. Exercise can also help in increasing energy levels and improving mood. Additionally, it is essential to take breaks and have some time for yourself to relax and de-stress. Taking care of yourself will not only benefit you but also your relationship with your partner.
Be Patient with Yourself
It is essential to be patient with yourself and understand that it takes time for the body to recover from childbirth. It is normal for the sex drive to not be as high as it was before giving birth. Do not put pressure on yourself to return to your pre-baby libido quickly. Understand that it is a gradual process, and it is okay to take things slow. Rushing into sex when you are not ready can cause discomfort and make the situation worse.
Explore Different Ways to Be Intimate
Intimacy is not limited to just sexual intercourse. There are many other ways to be intimate with your partner, such as cuddling, kissing, and spending quality time together. These activities can help in building emotional and physical intimacy, which can eventually lead to an increase in sexual desire. It is essential to communicate with your partner and find what works best for both of you. Be open to trying new things and be creative in finding ways to connect with your partner.
Seek Professional Help if Needed
If the decrease in sex drive persists and begins to affect your relationship and overall well-being, it is crucial to seek professional help. A doctor or therapist can help in identifying any underlying issues and provide appropriate treatment. They can also offer advice on how to improve intimacy in a relationship and manage any physical or emotional barriers that may be affecting your sex drive.
Conclusion
In conclusion, it is common for new mothers to experience a decrease in sex drive after having a baby. However, it is crucial to address this issue and find ways to rekindle the intimacy in a relationship. By understanding the effects of hormonal changes, communicating with your partner, taking care of your physical and mental health, being patient with yourself, exploring different ways to be intimate, and seeking professional help if needed, you can successfully get your sex drive back after having a baby. Remember, it is a gradual process, and with patience, understanding, and support from your partner, you can overcome this temporary hurdle and enjoy a fulfilling and satisfying sex life.
